Episode 3: Conquering Self-Doubt: Unleashing Your Inner Champion | Embracing Growth and Positivity

TRANSCRIPT

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I was talking to my friend who so badly wanted to start a YouTube channel. She was constantly worried about how it would turn out—whether people would like it or not, whether it was worth doing, and so many more worries. So, I asked her if she REALLY wanted to start, and she said yes. Then, I told her that if you're being judgmental towards yourself, how do you expect others to appreciate your work? She thought about it for a moment, realized I was right, and was happy with my reply.

*Intro Music*

Hello welcome back to another episode of The Dhiya Talks, this is me your host Dhiya. A podcast dropping every Thursday.

Today, let's talk about negative self-talk and how to deal with it. Before moving forward, let me thank all my dear listeners for supporting me. I'll be dropping episode updates and my life stories on Instagram, so don't forget to follow me there. Also, Spotify has been updated, and now we can rate the podcasts out of 5. I kindly request all of you to please rate my podcast on the Spotify app. Your ratings will motivate me to consistently release episodes.

Coming back to negative self-talk—what is it?

Negative self-talk refers to the internal dialogue or thoughts that are critical, self-deprecating, and undermine one's self-esteem and confidence. It involves the habit of speaking to oneself in a harsh, judgmental, or pessimistic manner. This type of self-talk can have a detrimental impact on mental well-being, self-image, and overall personal development.

Back in my teens, I used to do this a lot. I was always doubting myself, holding myself back, not willing to step out of my comfort zone, and all the possible things you could think of. But now, I'm my number one supporter. And if you're someone who has known me since my childhood or teens, you would really notice the difference in my character and appearance.

Why did I mention the term 'appearance' here? It has significance. I was with my girls, and we were in the washroom. I had this extra crop top of mine, and one of my friends grabbed it from my hand and told me she wished she could wear such tops. Unfortunately, she said she was too fat for it. So, I told her immediately that no one is too fat or too thin to wear what they like. If you like it, just do it. Let the jobless people judge while we slay and have fun.

This is actually a form of negative self-talk, which is self-criticism—constantly putting oneself down, focusing on perceived flaws or mistakes, and believing that one is not good enough. Why do we even need others' approval or disapproval for doing something? If we like it, let's just do it.

I had this neighbor who used to constantly compare her son with other students his age—about how others performed academically and how much he struggled. Parents might think they're pushing their child to perform better, but this actually hurts the child's self-confidence. The child, as an adult, will constantly measure themselves against others and feel inferior as a result. Another form of negative self-talk can be seen through perfectionism—applying unrealistically high standards to whatever work they do and feeling inadequate when those standards aren't met.

Overcoming negative self-talk is a crucial step toward personal growth and improved mental well-being. I'll be sharing 5 tips that can help you alleviate negative self-talk and be more gentle with yourself. Please remember that these tips are based on my own experiences and not on my psychology degree or anything like that.

Starting with the first point—being aware and mindful. This is the first thing I do when something makes me sad or stressed. I ask myself what the actual problem is, trying to find the root cause. Let me share an example: a few weeks ago, I was really sad. It wasn't the first time, of course. I was sad because I couldn't get much reach on my Instagram page. After hours of sulking and not finding a solution on its own, I sat down and became aware of what was really happening to my content. I brainstormed and found many solutions. From this, I picked the best one, broke it down into smaller parts, and now my account has good reach. See how being aware and mindful really solved the problem? Similarly, you might have relationship problems, issues with friends, or anything else. Sip a coffee, sit down, and brainstorm. The problem won't be solved by itself unless you take action and stand up.

The second one is practicing positive affirmations. Suppose I want to do something out of my comfort zone, like singing on stage. But the thought of not winning crosses my mind, and suddenly, my confidence drops. In this situation, I tell myself that I will win no matter what. How can others do it if I cannot? It's like making my subconscious believe in my capability, ensuring I'll do better than others. Positive affirmations can really boost your confidence and reduce negativity. Affirmations you should practice daily are “I'm capable, I'm confident, I'm happy.” Personalize them with your insecurities.

The third one is to challenge and reframe your thoughts. Once you're aware of your negative thoughts, challenge them. Ask yourself if these thoughts are based on facts or assumptions. Try to reframe them with more balanced and realistic statements.

The fourth one is to limit comparisons. I know it's not possible to completely stop comparing yourself with others overnight, but one day you will. Avoid comparing yourself to others, as it often leads to feelings of inadequacy. Instead, focus on your own progress and growth. You don't have to compare yourself with others because different people have different lives and conditions. What's a downfall for one can be progress for another. You'll gain nothing by comparing yourself with others. Instead, what I do is compare myself with my past self—how much I've changed, how much knowledge and lessons I've learned. The conclusion you and I will always reach is positive: you're now where you once dreamed to be. To put it in quotes, you've actually made an effort to change your life.

The last thing I do that has helped me reduce negative self-talk is practicing gratitude. Always be thankful for what you have right now. In my childhood, I used to wonder what it would feel like to go to cafes and malls with my friends. Now I can do that. See how much life has changed and how much I should be grateful for these small victories? Never forget to celebrate the small moments and victories in your life, as they're proof that you're trying and you haven't given up. Cultivate the habit of gratitude by regularly acknowledging the positive aspects of your life. I journal or note down on my Notion page. I encourage all of you to do the same. Build a Notion template to practice gratitude starting today, and you'll thank me later.

These are the things I usually do when I find myself in a situation of negative self-talk. Let me conclude once more: the first step is being aware and mindful. The second is practicing positive affirmations. The third is challenging your thoughts. The fourth is stopping comparison. And the fifth is practicing gratitude.

i hope this helps and lets start doint the minimal things that can make us happy and improve our life daily. dont foget to tune into my previous episodes. and rate my podcast whereever you are listening too cause that will make my day 10 times better. and dont forget to follow me on instgram. I have created a newsletter for you guys so that i can update you with the small improvements i do and if you guys are interested go click in the link in my description and sign in and lets form a family. until the next episode this is me dhiya from the dhiya talks. Tataa" ChatGPT Here's the corrected transcript with the spelling mistakes addressed: "I was talking to my friend who so badly wanted to start a YouTube channel. She was constantly worried about how it would turn out—whether people would like it or not, whether it was worth doing, and so many more worries. So, I asked her if she REALLY wanted to start, and she said yes. Then, I told her that if you're being judgmental towards yourself, how do you expect others to appreciate your work? She thought about it for a moment, realized I was right, and was happy with my reply. Intro Music Hello… dropping every Thursday. Today, let's talk about negative self-talk and how to deal with it. Before moving forward, let me thank all my dear listeners for supporting me. I'll be dropping episode updates and my life stories on Instagram, so don't forget to follow me there. Also, Spotify has been updated, and now we can rate the podcasts out of 5. I kindly request all of you to please rate my podcast on the Spotify app. Your ratings will motivate me to consistently release episodes. Coming back to negative self-talk—what is it? Negative self-talk refers to the internal dialogue or thoughts that are critical, self-deprecating, and undermine one's self-esteem and confidence. It involves the habit of speaking to oneself in a harsh, judgmental, or pessimistic manner. This type of self-talk can have a detrimental impact on mental well-being, self-image, and overall personal development. Back in my teens, I used to do this a lot. I was always doubting myself, holding myself back, not willing to step out of my comfort zone, and all the possible things you could think of. But now, I'm my number one supporter. And if you're someone who has known me since my childhood or teens, you would really notice the difference in my character and appearance. Why did I mention the term 'appearance' here? It has significance. I was with my girls, and we were in the washroom. I had this extra crop top of mine, and one of my friends grabbed it from my hand and told me she wished she could wear such tops. Unfortunately, she said she was too fat for it. So, I told her immediately that no one is too fat or too thin to wear what they like. If you like it, just do it. Let the jobless people judge while we slay and have fun. This is actually a form of negative self-talk, which is self-criticism—constantly putting oneself down, focusing on perceived flaws or mistakes, and believing that one is not good enough. Why do we even need others' approval or disapproval for doing something? If we like it, let's just do it. I had this neighbor who used to constantly compare her son with other students his age—about how others performed academically and how much he struggled. Parents might think they're pushing their child to perform better, but this actually hurts the child's self-confidence. The child, as an adult, will constantly measure themselves against others and feel inferior as a result. Another form of negative self-talk can be seen through perfectionism—applying unrealistically high standards to whatever work they do and feeling inadequate when those standards aren't met. Overcoming negative self-talk is a crucial step toward personal growth and improved mental well-being. I'll be sharing 5 tips that can help you alleviate negative self-talk and be more gentle with yourself. Please remember that these tips are based on my own experiences and not on my psychology degree or anything like that. Starting with the first point—being aware and mindful. This is the first thing I do when something makes me sad or stressed. I ask myself what the actual problem is, trying to find the root cause. Let me share an example: a few weeks ago, I was really sad. It wasn't the first time, of course. I was sad because I couldn't get much reach on my Instagram page. After hours of sulking and not finding a solution on its own, I sat down and became aware of what was really happening to my content. I brainstormed and found many solutions. From this, I picked the best one, broke it down into smaller parts, and now my account has good reach. See how being aware and mindful really solved the problem? Similarly, you might have relationship problems, issues with friends, or anything else. Sip a coffee, sit down, and brainstorm. The problem won't be solved by itself unless you take action and stand up. The second one is practicing positive affirmations. Suppose I want to do something out of my comfort zone, like singing on stage. But the thought of not winning crosses my mind, and suddenly, my confidence drops. In this situation, I tell myself that I will win no matter what. How can others do it if I cannot? It's like making my subconscious believe in my capability, ensuring I'll do better than others. Positive affirmations can really boost your confidence and reduce negativity. Affirmations you should practice daily are “I'm capable, I'm confident, I'm happy.” Personalize them with your insecurities. The third one is to challenge and reframe your thoughts. Once you're aware of your negative thoughts, challenge them. Ask yourself if these thoughts are based on facts or assumptions. Try to reframe them with more balanced and realistic statements. The fourth one is to limit comparisons. I know it's not possible to completely stop comparing yourself with others overnight, but one day you will. Avoid comparing yourself to others, as it often leads to feelings of inadequacy. Instead, focus on your own progress and growth. You don't have to compare yourself with others because different people have different lives and conditions. What's a downfall for one can be progress for another. You'll gain nothing by comparing yourself with others. Instead, what I do is compare myself with my past self—how much I've changed, how much knowledge and lessons I've learned. The conclusion you and I will always reach is positive: you're now where you once dreamed to be. To put it in quotes, you've actually made an effort to change your life. The last thing I do that has helped me reduce negative self-talk is practicing gratitude. Always be thankful for what you have right now. In my childhood, I used to wonder what it would feel like to go to cafes and malls with my friends. Now I can do that. See how much life has changed and how much I should be grateful for these small victories? Never forget to celebrate the small moments and victories in your life, as they're proof that you're trying and you haven't given up. Cultivate the habit of gratitude by regularly acknowledging the positive aspects of your life. I journal or note down on my Notion page. I encourage all of you to do the same. Build a Notion template to practice gratitude starting today, and you'll thank me later. These are the things I usually do when I find myself in a situation of negative self-talk. Let me conclude once more: the first step is being aware and mindful. The second is practicing positive affirmations. The third is challenging your thoughts. The fourth is stopping comparison. And the fifth is practicing gratitude. I hope this helps and lets start doing the minimal things that can make us happy and improve our life daily. Don't foget to tune into my previous episodes. And rate my podcast whereever you are listening too cause that will make my day 10 times better. and don't forget to follow me on Instgram. I have created a newsletter for you guys so that I can update you with the small improvements I do and if you guys are interested go click in the link in my description and sign in and lets form a family. Until the next episode this is me Dhiya from The Dhiya Talks.

*Outro music*